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50 Ways To Leave Your Rover

Posted in Main Blog (All Posts) on June 11th, 2008 4:39 am by HL

50 Ways To Leave Your Rover
According to Paul Alexander’s new biography, “Machiavelli’s Shadow: The Rise and Fall of Karl Rove,” The Architect didn’t jump, he was pushed.  And from a rather surprising edifice…

Bush & Rove

He’s just not that into you.
(White House photo by Joyce Boghosian)

According to Paul Alexander’s new biography, “Machiavelli’s Shadow: The Rise and Fall of Karl Rove,” The Architect didn’t jump, he was pushed.  And from a rather surprising edifice…

On a Sunday in midsummer, George W. Bush accompanied Karl Rove to the Episcopalian Church Rove sometimes attended…. [O]n this Sunday, Rove thought he was doing what he often did: spending time with the man for whom he had worked, almost exclusively, for nearly a decade and a half. The two men entered the church along with their wives. They made their way to the front of the congregation. Then, during their time in the church, Bush gave Rove some stunning news.

“Karl,” Bush said, “there’s too much heat on you. It’s time for you to go.”

In the calm solitude of the church, these were no doubt the last words Rove expected to hear. But Bush had said them. They were now a reality. As anyone who serves at the pleasure of the president knows, Rove had to do as he was told.

“Yes, sir, Mr. President. I understand.”

Yes, that’s right: Dubya fired Rove in church, possibly because the Big Strong Resolute Decider was afraid that his jilted underling might cause a scene.

And if that’s not enough, here are some nice juicy quotes from disgruntled Republicans:

“Every Republican I know looks at the Bush administration as a total failure,” said Matt Towery, chairman of Newt Gingrich’s political organization.

“To do what he did politically to us is unforgivable,” Rep. Tom Tancredo told Alexander. “It will take generations to recover. I don’t know how long; maybe never.”

“I think the legacy is that Karl Rove will be a name that’ll be used for a long, long time as an example of how not to do it,” said long-time GOP strategist Ed Rollins.

Awesome.  Everyone sing along with me:

Launch him from the pew, Hugh
Dump him in the nave, Dave
Whack him with the cross, Boss
Just don’t make a scene

Throw him out the narthex, Tex– Okay, stopping now.

Feel free to add verses in the comments, tho!

(Thanks to egregious for the nave line, and bmaz, emptywheel, watertiger, Julia, Suzanne, and kirk for their backstage contributions and general inspiration)

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