The Hollywood Liberal

RESUME OF GEORGE W BUSH
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington , DC 20520

EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:

LAW ENFORCEMENT

I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving under the influence of
alcohol. I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver’s license suspended for 30
days. My Texas driving record has been “lost” and is not available.

PAST WORK EXPERIENCE

-I was a cheerleader.

–I ran for U.S. Congress and lost.
–I began my career in the oil business in Midland, Texas, in 1975. I bought an oil
company, but couldn’t find any oil in Texas .. The company went bankrupt shortly
after I sold all my stock.
–I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using
taxpayer money.
–With the help of my father and our friends in the oil industry, including Enron
CEO Ken Lay, I was elected governor of Texas.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS

–I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil companies.
–During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden city in
America.
–I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the tune of billions in borrowed
money.
–I set the record for the most executions by any governor in American history.
–With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida, and my father’s appointments
to the Supreme Court, I became President after losing by over 500,000 votes.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT

–I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost of over one billion
dollars per week.
–I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury. I shattered
the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S. history.
–I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.
–I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.
–I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of the US stock
market.
–In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans lost their jobs and that
trend continues every month.
–I’m proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in
U.S. history. My “poorest millionaire,” Condoleeza Rice, had a Chevron oil tanker
named after her.
–I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a U.S. President. I am
the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for receiving the most corporate campaign
donations.
–My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay,
presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History, Enron.
–My political party used Enron private jets and corporate attorneys to assure my
success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my election decision.
–I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton against investigation or
prosecution. More time and money was spent investigating the Monica Lewinsky affair
than has been spent investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history.
–I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and refused to intervene
when corruption involving the oil industry was revealed.
–I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history. I changed the U.S.
policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.
–I appointed more convicted criminals to administration than any President in U.S.
history.
–I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest bureaucracy in the
history of the United States government.
–I’ve broken more international treaties than any President in U.S. history.
–I am the first President in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the
U.S. from the Human Rights Commission.
–I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.
–I refused to allow inspectors access to U.S. “prisoners of war” detainees and
thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention.
–I am the first President in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors
(during the 2002 U.S. election).
–I set the record for fewest numbers of press conferences of any President since
the advent of television.
–I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year period.
–After taking off the entire month of August, I presided over the worst security
failure in U.S. history.
— I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the World Trade Center attacks
and less than a year later made the U.S.the most hated country in the world, the
largest failure of diplomacy in world history.

–I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously protest
me in public venues (15 million people), shattering the record for protests against
any person in the history of mankind.

–I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut in duty
benefits for active duty troops and their families-in-wartime.
–In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for attacking Iraq and
then blamed the lies on our British friends.
–I am the first President in history to have a majority of Europeans view my
presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security.
–I am supporting development of a nuclear “Tactical Bunker Buster,” a WMD.
–I have redefined the Pure Water Act to allow increased quantities of mercury,
arsenic, and other toxins in drinking water.
–I have allowed road building, logging, mining and drilling on public lands
entrusted to my stewardship by all the presidents since Teddy Roosevelt.
–I have the worst environmental protection record of any President in American
history.
–I erased the barrier between church and state by providing financial support to
Christian churches and withdrawing funding for stem cell research.
–I exposed an undercover CIA agent to the press in order to punish her husband who
disagreed with my justification on invading Iraq.
–I successfully placed incompetant political cronies in every position of authority
in government including but not limited to: CIA Dir., Sec. of Def., Dir. of Homeland
Sec., FEMA Dir., and Sec. of State.
–I have never vetoed a bill from Congress, but have annotated over 120 Bills with
my signature that these laws do not apply to me as President of the United States.
–I have suspended Americans civil rights to allow warrentless wire tapping, data
mining, bank record searches, and other surveillance that Americans don’t even know
about.
–I have established secret prisons in foreign countries and redefined torture.
–I have violated the Geneva Convention by imprisoning, torturing and denying due
process to hundreds of “detainees” in Cuba.
–I rejected my General’s plans for troop strength, military hardware shortages, and
strategies for reconstruction of post- war Iraq, and fired any General who disagreed
with me.
–I allowed the award of hundreds of billions of dollars in no-bid contracts to
companies that my Vice President is connected to and failed to hold them accountable
for defaulting on those contracts.
–I edited, classified, destroyed, or discredited any scientific research that did
not support my policies including but not limited to issues of: global warming, stem
cell research, numbers of civilian casualties in Iraq, impact of troops in Iraq on
the grouth of terrorism.
–I have failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden [sic] to justice.

RECORDS AND REFERENCES

–All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are now in my father’s library,
sealed and unavailable for public view.
–All records of SEC investigations into my insider trading and my bankrupt
companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
–All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my Vice-President, attended
regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public
review.
–I am a member of the Republican Party.

PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN THE 2006 MID-TERM ELECTIONS.